While I was busy with some domestic chores today,she kept running around happily as usual and I was busy with my mind thinking about zillion issues at the same.
At a point she ran towards the spot where I was observing my domestic obligations shouting ‘daddy’ at the top of her voice but when I asked her,she said nothing.
I shook my head and smiled.
This was how it happened in 1992 in the middle of the year while I was in JSS 2 that my parents separated.
Before the ugly experience,all I think in my small mind was that my parents are having it cool, good and rosy with the relationship but not knowing that both have been having strain since 1989 while I was in Primary 5.
Kudos to them because they were able to keep it to themselves without allowing any one of us to have an inkling of what lies ahead of us.
To cut the story short,it was rough and raw later but I realized that we were scammed and prevented from having a knowledge that all that glitters is not gold.
Someone might be asking me the reason why parenting is filled with zillions of cover ups.
Our parents are gods and gold that should be appreciated till eternity for how they were able to cope with the demands and rigors of parenting.
They were secretive in keeping the realities of parenting from us and they were able to manage themselves until many of us grew up to the point whereby we become a parent too.
Is it moments of loneliness, extreme thinking,debt,shame and reproach accompanied with self-denials that warrants commitments ,dedication, perseverance and maturity that cannot be explained and expressed to us while we were growing up?
The selflessness and sacrifices laid down by our parents are out of this world.
Some laid their dreams,aspiration and vision aside to give us a life that we have today without giving us an inkling of what it takes for them to mold us till this present moment.
Parenting is a journey of sacrifice and selflessness having it wrapped in commitment and dedication that cannot be relayed to us while they were passing through the fiery furnace of standing in the gap for us.
Many parents were denied comforts and conveniences of life in order for some of us to have life.
What about the days of nakedness and hunger that many parents passed through for their wards to have a meaningful life?
What about the days of anguish, pain and agony they passed through, and they kept it to themselves but they made us to have our life being rosy without any form of discomfort been on their faces.
In spite of all these, our parents still ensured and advised that some of us get married so that they can have their grandchildren, even some parents go out of their ways to borrow money so that we can settle down on time.
Parenting can be assumed to be a scam in the sense that the responsibilities and the demands are kept away from us by our parents.
They made us to believe in the rosiness and beauty of marriage so that many of us will not be discouraged becoming a parent in the future.
They were able to keep and bottled their challenges and scuffles within the confines of their rooms but they always act their scripts perfectly whenever they noticed we were around which made some of us to lack the inkling of what the reality of life is as it relates to parenting is concerned.
This is the reason whenever we loose any of our parents, we always fill their vacuum because they were extraordinary in shading and covering the other side of parenting that is filled with regrets, challenges and emotion.
They are good actors that acted their scripts well by keeping from us and preventing us from having a feel and a touch of the realities of parenting.
Double thumbs up to our parents for been matured enough to give us make over beliefs that parenting is sweet but at this moment,something tells me that I have been scammed to believe that parenting is rosy, cool and good.
Not that I am passing through any challenge but my personal observation and present realities made me to see in practical form that parenting is nothing but selflessness and sacrifice.
These days I have to leave office on time so that I would be able to meet up with my daughter in order to help with her assignment and to see her face before she goes to bed.
It is on the note of today being another mothers’ day celebration that I present to you that parenting is filled with scam and cover up that are orchestrated by our parents in order to live a sacrificial and a selfless life that is necessitated by their efforts to leave a legacy for their children.
With all humility,I dedicate this piece to all responsible parents, good mothers, ladies and women that I have come across my paths.
HAPPY MOTHERS’ DAY TO:
Mrs JNM FADEYI,
Mrs.Olaronke Oluwakemi Fadeyi
Miss faith funmi fadeyi